Team mates: Colchester United ‘keeper Jamie Jones

Best mate at the club?

Alex Gilbey because I've known him the longest. This is the first time we've played for the same team, but we went to the Champions League final together to watch beat Bayern Munich.

Last to buy dinner?

Chris Porter is the tightest man. Every time we go to Costa after training, he always tries to swerve his round and says it's someone else's.

FIFA King?

I wouldn't have a clue, I'm not a FIFA man. I like Call of Duty. Jack Curtis is best at that. We try to play online quite a bit, but he's far better at it than me.

Worst dressed?

Tom Eastman. He wears trackies everyday and oversized t-shirts, just horrendous. He never scrubs up – even at the Christmas do he didn't look great.

Dressing room DJ?

That's mainly Gavin Massey or Callum Harriott. It's not my kind of music, it's all R&B. I like dance and house music but that never seems to get played, so I just try to get out of the dressing room as soon as I can!

Most skilful?

Callum Harriott. He's got a few skills. He likes to show them off in training, sometimes too much when he does an extra step over, but most of the time it comes off.

Late for training?

Matthew Briggs. He paid the most in fines for our Christ-mas party, just because he is constantly late. We have to pay £200 if we're late on match days and £100 for training but in November everything's doubled. He never seems to have an excuse either.

Teacher's pet?

Joe Edwards. He's always at the front of the jogs in the warm-up, at the front for the hurdles, sucking up to the fitness guy and things like that.

Worst ?

I wouldn't know. There are a few kids in this team, so they probably don't know how to make beans on toast. I love cooking myself. My signature dish is Scouse, which is a kind of stew. I made it for Joe Edwards and Alex Gilbey recently and they said it tasted wonderful, so I'll take that.

First on the dancefloor?

George Elokobi, or maybe Gavin Massey – he's got a few moves. He cuts up some shapes and, to be fair, he's not too bad.

Worst tattoo?

There are a lot of tattoos floating around but Owen Garvan has got this horrendous one that completely covers his back. I couldn't even tell you what it is. It's that bad that I try not to look at it.

Never puts their phone down?

Everyone is pretty bad but Callum Harriott got fined the most last month for being on his phone in the changing room. I think you get fined a tenner each time.

Partial to a sunbed?

George Moncur always seems to have a little cheeky tan. He either gets a spray tan or a sunbed – I'm not sure which.

Going to make the best manager?

I can see Chris Porter being a manager. He is our club captain and he always says a bit after games. It's not always the best things that he says, but at least he's got the conviction to say something.

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